The value of communication about finances in a marriage or relationship.
Written by Ansja Ferreira
Do you communicate enough about your finances? Here’s advice:
“My husband was the breadwinner and I stayed at home to care for the children”, explains *Glenda du Toit. My husband suddenly died in a car accident 3 years ago and I was totally confused and shocked. I did not know what was going on in my husband’s finances and did not even know whether he had made provision for us or where he kept his important documents. It was a terrible traumatic time for me. I was not used to paying bills or to making important financial decisions. I felt lost. My husband’s brother came to help me at least, and we sought the documents until we found them and went through them. It would have been much better and less traumatic for me if my husband took the time to inform me what was going on in his finances”, she says.
On average, women live longer than men. For this reason, as well as the high divorce rate, it is important that women empower themselves and learn how to handle their finances. If seen in a historical context, men were mainly the breadwinner, who handled all financial matters.
The situation has changed considerably and now women often take control of their work and household. Yet many women shy away to take charge of their finances and often leave all financial decisions to a man.
Why is this happening? A woman can handle her finances just as well as a man. This may have to do with the women’s role as caregiver and that a woman might have set other’s interests above herself. It can also happen that a woman never learned to take control of her finances because somebody was always available to do so on her behalf.
Many women only realise after a divorce, death or serious illness of a spouse, that they do not know how to handle their finances. They may possibly never have learned how to deal with financial aspects of work and money matters. This can have catastrophic consequences for such a woman and her children. To suddenly sit with mortgage debt, car payments, school fees, policies and to also be confronted with funeral arrangements, is not easy, especially if you do not know how to handle it or where everything is held.
It has even happened that a woman does not know where and how to pay a municipal account. We had a look at what women need to know.
- Make sure you know where all the important documents such as wills, birth certificates, account numbers and policy documentation are filed. If anything happens to your husband, you know where everything can be found.
- If you are single, it is important that everything is organized and kept together and that your next of kin knows where your imporatnt documents are kept, should something happen.
- Make copies of important documents so you can use it if the originals are lost.
- Make sure that you understand the details of your insurance documents and what they entail.
- Also make sure you that you are not over or under-insured. If you have any doubt, make an appointment with a specialist broker who can explain things to you. Make sure that you will be able to pay the raising premiums in the future.
- Talk to your husband about this. Life insurance can bring peace of mind and an income for you and your children when your husband is no longer there.
It is important to take your children’s future education and maintenance in mind when you talk about the amount.
- If you die without a will, the law determines what become of your belongings. You will die intestate, which simply means “without any legal will.” In this instance the rules of intestate succession will come in effect. Remember that verbal wishes and promises have no legal effect or may not be followed. Draw up a will as quickly as possible in order to save your family a lot of misery.
- In your will, you should also name your children’s guardians so that there is someone who can take care of them if you and their father die together.
- Tell a relative you trust where you will is kept and who will administer your estate.
